What if we helped Sir Charles?
Charles Barkley's legacy – brilliant NBA player, zero NBA titles – was so certain by his seventh pro season that he spent a hearty chunk of this 1992 autobiography discussing worries over never winning a championship. It was Barkley's mark to bear before he was traded from Philadelphia to Phoenix the summer following this book's winter release, before Barkley retired, before Charles joined the TNT set. His ringless existence is the major source of personal consternation, chief among all for Barkley inside the 28-year old's autobiography.
Yes, this is the autobiography in which Barkley promises he was "misquoted," which we'll discuss, but it ain't much, co-author Roy S. Johnson did marvelous work. Barkley took issue with Johnson's distillation of Chuck's comments regarding the hesitant Hersey Hawkins and the late Armen Gilliam. Chuck doesn't think Hersey looks for the dagger, Barkley doesn't think Gilliam rebounds, big deal.
The lost deals are what Charles laments. Two marbled centers, Moses Malone and Mike Gminski, sliced from the Sixer starting lineup. Many other missed maneuvers under then-Sixers owner Howard Katz, the weight-loss king who made his millions on unhealthy health products.
"I've got three more good years left," Barkley told Katz in the fourth page of his autobiography.
"Get a clue."
Strong letters followed. The book was published in early 1992 and put together after Barkley watched his buddy's Bulls win Chicago's first NBA title in 1991. Charles knew Chicago was set to rule the next decade, angst drips from the pages of this book like sweat from the brow of a lamestain.
"They way I've got it figured," Barkley insists early, "they'll never be another player like me again. There'll never be another player who is 6-4 and averages more than ten rebounds a game, scores inside whenever he wants to against bigger opponents, and is quicker than most everybody he plays against."
Charles required his status assured, as surely as it behooves one to emanate the right air.
For fear of loss of station.
The 29-year old Barkley was traded to the Suns in the 1992 offseason, the 1992-93 MVP to-be dealt for 29-year old Jeff Hornacek, an All-Star in 1991-92. Phoenix also sent Philly (proven late lottery bust) Tim Perry and center Andrew Lang.
Hornacek worked a season and a half in Philadelphia before the Sixers shipped him to Utah at the 1994 trade deadline for Jeff Malone (two years older than Hornacek) in a cost-cutting move. Malone worked 71 games over the next two-plus seasons, made about $3.5 million. Philly also earned a pick from Utah, 1994's No. 17 selection B.J. Tyler, 809 career NBA minutes.
Philadelphia deserves better than this. Charles Barkley deserves better than this.
Barkley doesn't mention the Suns in the book, rather pining for a chance to turn the Clippers around. Or make the Heat into something (if the Heat doesn't have to deal Sherman Douglas, Glen Rice or Rony Seikaly in exchange for Chuck, according to Chuck).
Creating beneficial fake trades for Charles Barkley's prime is easy after considering what Katz gave up: I love Jeff Hornacek, but we can beat Jerry Colangelo and his Suns' offer. Even while taking on the unfortunate qualification of Harold Katz' distaste for paying rookies. Katz didn't take any picks from Phoenix for Barkley, and spent most of Charles' career trading away 76ers first-rounders.
Chuck was sent to the Suns a week before the 1992 draft. In our scenario, another team wins the heart of Harold Katz at the 1992 trade deadline. Where otherwise the only deal was the (say it with me) Knicks sending Brian Quinnett to the Mavericks for James Donaldson.
HEAT INSPIRED DIVORCE
Miami can beat Phoenix with its offer of Bimbo Coles, Terry Davis, rookie Steve Smith and Grant Long for Charles Barkley, Johnny Dawkins, and Hersey Hawkins.
Hawkins, an All-Star in 1990-91, was due to have his salary quadrupled. Katz loses that obligation in exchange for the well-regarded Smitty, making $150,000 less than Hersey, three years younger, five inches taller. Katz gives up two All-Stars in Barkley and Hawkins but relives himself of the dead weight of Dawkins' post-ACL production, nearly a $6 million commitment between the 1992 trade deadline and Dawkins' contract's expiration in 1995.
The Heat will think we're doofuses because of our haircut and also because we're asking for Coles and/or Davis ahead of Kevin Edwards, a 25-year old averaging a dozen points per game for Miami. But we're in 2025, and we know Kevin Edwards is nope, straight nope.
(Point guard) Bimbo and (center) Terry will be among the best backups at their positions for a decade, if the Sixers let them. Grant Long was about as famed as role players came in the 1990s. Smitty is Smitty. The 1993 Heat still cut Willie Burton and Willie Burton still drops 53 on the Heat as a member of the (now playoff-bound) Sixers in 1995.
Charles Barkley and Rony Seikaly and Hawkins and Glen Rice and Sherm Douglas are the business. The Heat retain Brian Shaw and Keith Askins, quality depth for the rest of the decade, plus Miami's 1992 first-rounder.
Charles pushes the Heat for a few wins in spring 1992, a loss on the night of the trade but otherwise 21-8 with Barkley in the lineup. Good for 45-37 record and the pick that turns into Doug Christie, Jordan's all-time toughest defender.
It won't be enough in the 1992 Eastern finals. The Heat throttle the Celtics and Cavaliers in the first two rounds before falling to Michael's Bulls in the third. But 1992-93? Douglas and Seikaly and Rice and Hawkins all gave the Bulls fits, Christie contributes right away, Barkley remains on his MVP mission. I'm a Bulls fan and I don't like this matchup, at all. Bulls in five.
Sixers lose more to end 1991-92 but still draft Clarence Weatherspoon, underrated dude.
Spoon was never Barkley but still a top-six or seven player from the 1992 draft, the Sixers stole him at No. 9.
The improved Smitty-led Sixers are basically the Heat now, not bad, and take Lindsey Hunter with the No. 10 pick in the 1993 draft.
With Spoon in hand, the Sixers can send Grant Long to the SuperSonics in exchange for Philly's own 1994 first-round selection back, as the Sixers did in our timeline.
The Sixers win a few more games (under coach Doug Moe) in 1993-94 and end up with the No. 10 pick, selecting local product Eddie Jones.
The long-armed phalanx of EJ, Smitty, Spoon and Hunter are let loose to lunge for steals and move the ball under Moe.
Katz sells the team to Pat Croce, who notices all this cap space and signs ex-Sixer Jayson Williams in the 1995 offseason. Philly is interesting, will retain cap room again in 1996 (Dikembe Mutombo?), and may even battle with Miami for second-place supremacy behind Jordan's Bulls.
Jerry Colangelo is forced to sell Suns, takes unspecified job at major shoe company. Makes way more money there.
SUPERSONICS
We could send Barkley to Seattle in exchange for Shawn Kemp and the rights to Philly's own 1994 first-round pick (which Seattle owned at the time of the 1992 trade deadline, earned in the deal which sent Xavier McDaniel to Phoenix).
A Sixers squad featuring Kemp and Hawkins and Weatherspoon and the 1993 pick (still Lindsey Hunter) would certainly be in line to lose enough games to select Eddie Jones in 1994.
In his autobiography, Charles surmised nobody in the 1990 draft as worth a whoop-de-damn-do besides No. 1 pick Derrick Coleman. But we'd still like to see Barkley's incoming 1992-93 MVP Seattle season alongside the No. 2 pick in the 1990 draft, Gary Payton.
CHUCK TO CHARLOTTE
Closer to Leeds.
Larry Johnson, Johnny Newman (an adversary in Charles' book, let's keep him that way) and J.R. Reid for Charles (Shackleford's contract) and Barkley.
Sir Charles mentioned that he liked Hornet Kendall Gill's game (if not Kendall's contract). The deal reunites Charles with ex-Sixer Mike Gminski (big plus for Barkley) and never pairs Barkley with J.R. Reid (big plus for Barkley).
Charles joins G-Man and Gill and Dell Curry and Rex Chapman and Muggsy Bogues, who we know Barkley performs well alongside:
Hornets don't get Alonzo Mourning but do nab Alabama forward Robert Horry in the 1992 draft. Later Charlotte deals Gill and a pick to Sacramento for Mitch Richmond and Henry James, and nearly everyone on the Charlotte Hornets is originally from somewhere less than 400 miles away.
Philly trainer Pat Croce saves Larry Johnson's career with personalized motivation techniques and also back exercises.
Seattle coach George Karl covets Carolina product J.R. Reid in 1993, convinces SuperSonics GM Wally Walker to deal Philly's 1994 first-rounder back to Philly for Reid, Karl is fired after 1994. Walker hires Gregg Popovich to coach the SuperSonics, Seattle sweeps Charlotte to win 1995 NBA title, NBA forced to write check to NBC worth a reported $82 million.
Sixers go on to draft Clarence Weatherspoon and Lindsey Hunter and Eddie Jones.
DO THE LAKERS, KELLY
Yes, we know, there is also the Laker scenario: Charles was told before the 1992 trade deadline that he and Sixer teammate Ron Anderson were off to Los Angeles for Elden Campbell (fine) and James Worthy (but a decade after James Worthy broke his leg).
Charles was told this and got daydrunk.
The Sixers sobered up and realized the deal was a dud, changed their mind, Barkley was buzzed in a game that night, we did a big thing on it but, fine, let's give Barkley to the Lakers.
Los Angeles is full of players Barkley bemoans in the book: Sedale Threatt (Sir Charles sez he's a party guy), Jake Haley (Sir Charles sez he's a fake tough guy). Plus Cliff Robinson, not that one (party guy whom Charles insisted "loved the good life," and a fake tough guy).
There is the quotable excitement of pairing Charles with Vlade Divac and A.C. Green and their respective interests. Charles keeps the Lakers good enough to make the playoffs, but also good enough to keep the team from drafting Anthony Peeler (Jerry West selects Jon Barry instead) George Lynch (Scott Burrell) and Eddie Jones (Aaron McKie).
The 76ers survive capably with Worthy for two weeks before George Karl deals Philly's 1994 first-round pick back to Philly for James Worthy. Campbell earns an Eastern All-Star berth as Philadelphia moves along to draft Clarence Weatherspoon and Lindsey Hunter and Eddie Jones.
CLIPPERS
I will not make Charles Barkley a Clipper. This column explores life if everything went right for Charles Barkley, not if everything ran terribly.
MEMO: KEEP G-MAN
Barkley spends half the book shaking his head over the loss of Moses Malone, traded from the Sixers ahead of the 1986 draft. The other half misses center Mike Gminski, dealt to Charlotte in Dec. 1989 for score-first big forward Armen Gilliam. Another cost-cutting move.
Barkley worked at small forward at the time, 76ers power forward Rick Mahorn was moved to center and Gilliam asked to pick up all the buckets in between. Mahorn did dirty work happily but hated playing the pivot, Rick wasn't a shot-swatter or rebounder but the 76ers already gave up a first-round pick and substantial salary for Barkley's smiling bodyguard.
What if we can keep the books happy, while retaining everyone at their favorite position? The problem for Katz and the Sixers wasn't just cost, but sunken investments. Mahorn's no-statsdom is at least a minutes-eating zilch, whereas Johnny Dawkins' spot on the payroll sits as lost cash.
In the 1989 offseason the Sixer front office swapped 33-year old Maurice Cheeks for 26-year old Johnny Dawkins. Through 81 starts in 1989-90, Dawkins averaged 14 points and seven assists, earning a robust contract extension in the offseason before tearing his ACL four games into 1990-91.
Dawkins' salary sticks while he mends, I can't pretend the Sixers made anything less than a great deal when they traded the aging Cheeks for Maurice's much-younger replacement. But what if we loosen commitments in another area? The Hornets were dealing into cap space when they took an extra quarter-million in salary to acquire Duke product Mike Gminski, sending Philly not only Armen Gilliam but also Dave Hoppen.
Wanna cut a quarter-million? I can cut you a quarter-million. Pretend I'm Charles Grodin from the movie 'Dave,' starring Charles Grodin. Hold onto our Gminski, cut overhead. If this were my business, I'd be out of business.
Teams don't want (bad Philly 1989 first-round pick) Kenny Payne at $400,000 or (bad Philly 1990 trade acquisition) Manute Bol at $1.3 million.
What about (bad trade acquisition) Jayson Williams (who makes $500,000) and (poorly-shooting) shooting guard Ron Anderson ($425,000) to the Bulls for (sweet-shooting) shooting guard Craig Hodges?
Hodges ($600,000) hadn't handed that letter to the president yet but don't bet for a second the Bulls (Phil Jackson, first) didn't think that was in him. The Sixers need shooting, even if Hodges won't guard.
Philly gives up on Jayson Williams? In real life, Phoenix drafts Williams No. 21 overall in 1990, Jayson Williams holds out over the offseason. Philly sends its 1994 first-round pick to Phoenix for the unsigned rookie during 1990-91 training camp, Williams signs with Philly, plays like a beer burp. Two undignified campaigns follow and Philly sends Williams to the Nets for two second-round picks.
Jayson Williams is a future All-Star, but at this point we're pretending to be Philly GM Gene Shue, a 59-year old who sported a crewcut deep into his 40s. Flipping Jayson Williams to Chicago (the Bulls are certain to decline Cliff Levingston and possibly Scott Williams' options next summer, Jerry Krause considered Williams as a free agent in 1995) saves Philly $325,000. Barkley keeps his G-Man.
Send Anderson and Williams to Houston for combusting by-then Vernon Maxwell and future Barkley laughmate Matt Bullard, save $555,000. Trading for Miami's Keith Askins and Terry Davis saves $525,000.
The same pair (Anderson/Williams) for versatile Cavs forward Chucky Brown saves Philly $295,000, but Shue didn't see it, and the Sixers remain one of the 17 NBA teams Chucky Brown did not play for.
The same savings from Sacramento sends the Sixers super-shooter Jim Les' pro-rated deal, plus Bobby Hansen, two square shoulders to replace Anderson (and the previous season's Scott Brooks minutes). Maybe send Jayson and Ron to Utah for burly big man Mike Brown, save $275,000, I'm trying to be Gene Shue.
MEMO: WASHINGTON
Sorry for these provocative titles, I've been reading a lot of E. Howard Hunt novels. Covers. Reading the covers of E. Howard Hunt novels, then deciding not to read the novels.
The Bullets almost drafted Charles Barkley, twice. After a Washington scout relayed an assurance that Barkley would be selected by the team in the first-round, Barkley considered declaring for the 1983 NBA draft as a sophomore under the "hardship" rule. Washington owned the No. 10 and No. 22 selections in the 1983 draft and promised to select Barkley with the latter, choosing Mississippi shooting guard Jeff Malone at No. 10.
Instead, Barkley stayed for a junior season at Auburn, and Washington welcomed No. 22 pick Randy Wittman.
Had to be Randy, huh, says every Wizards fan.
If Barkley declares, however, he pairs with Rick Mahorn and Jeff Malone (an All-Star in 1986 and 1987), future Sixer teammate Sedale Threatt and future Suns teammate Frank Johnson. Washington also starts Cliff Robinson, not that one, and future All-Star center Jeff Ruland.
To clear room at Barkley's position, the Bullets ship veteran forward Greg Ballard to the Jazz for Utah's pick in the 1984 draft, Washington selecting Vern Fleming instead of John Stockton.
Charles Barkley likes John Stockton, but I'm not doing that to Charles Barkley.
Washington also had a chance in 1984. Barkley famously put on weight before his actual draft night, hoping the 76ers (who promised to pick Chuck at No. 5) would pass on Barkley. Charles was fine with Philadelphia and the Sixers roster, but balked at the idea of the salary cap forcing him into a five-figure first-year salary.
The NBA had something we'll call "the Larry Bird Rule But a Different One."
In a bid to stop deep squads like the Celtics from selecting stashed first-round picks, NBA teams over the salary cap or without available roster spots for first-round picks either forfeited their first-round pick, or signed the extra roster holdover to a single-year salary of only $65,000 (the league minimum). The pick enters restricted free agency after one season.
No team forced a first-round pick into these options, but the Sixers didn't tell Barkley and Barkley's very-visible agent this before the draft. The capped-out, stocked-bench, Sixers gave Barkley no such assurances that they'd cut a spot or a pick.
This moved Barkley to force-feed a drop down to No. 6, and the Washington Bullets. Charles and his agent made the rounds, and I don't mean they worked out with other teams:
So [Barkley and his agent] went to Denny's and I had like two Grand Slam breakfasts. We went to lunch and I had like two big barbeque sandwiches. That night we went to a big steakhouse. The next morning I had two more Grand Slam breakfasts and when we flew to Philly, I weighed 302. I was like, 'Thank goodness, the Sixers are not going to draft me.'
The Sixers drafted him. Bullets? Took a man with larger weight problems than the 6-5, 302-pound Barkley: Mel "Dinner Bell" Turpin. Turpin was immediately flipped from Washington to Cleveland for Cliff Robinson, not that one, and center Tim McCormick.
Robinson later became a Sixer after Moses Malone was dealt to Washington. McCormick started at Sixers center for 79 games alongside Charles Barkley in 1986-87.
How did Philly get McCormick? The real-life Sixers were desperate for a pivotman after shipping Moses for Jeff Ruland, passing on Brad Daugherty in the 1986 draft, and watching Ruland retire due to foot woes in 1987. So Philly dealt a future first-round selection – 1989's No. 17 pick, Shawn Kemp – to Seattle for McCormick.
Rough. So,
WHAT IF THE SIXERS NEVER TRADE MOSES MALONE
Or, geez, what about Daugherty?
GOOD CALL
Do they have to choose between the two?
DOES IT DEPEND ON THE DRAFT?
Does it?
BECAUSE WE'D PICK BRAD FIRST OVERALL, RIGHT?
Of course. I think.
WHAT DID THE SIXERS SAY
Weird stuff, gloating stuff. The 76ers earned the top pick in the 1986 draft back in 1979. From the Clippers, in exchange for Joe "Kobe's Dad" Bryant.
Philly GM Pat Williams already parked the Barkley pick in the 1984 draft, working off a selection Pat earned six years prior from the Clippers, who dealt a future first for World "B." Free in 1978.
Williams was a good and pious man, behind each Clipper theft and responsible for the daring Barkley selection. By 1986 he was ready to talk about it:
“I guess the Clippers felt seven years would never come. Joe Bryant, where are you now?"
Playing professionally in Italy and raising his son to become 2009 NBA Finals MVP over Pat Williams' Orlando Magic.
"You know, it wasn’t like we sifted through lots of offers for Joe Bryant."
This makes you sound ungrateful and Joe and the Clippers look bad. Masterful executive trifecta.
"We didn’t think much of the trade at the time. I remember, back in ‘79, the Clippers were in San Diego and they were in need of forwards. The year before (1978) we traded (World B.) Free to them for the ’84 (first-round) pick. We used that for Charles Barkley. I hope and think we will get another player that can help us as much as Charles.”
Better, that's the typical humility and grace we learned to expect from Pat Williams. Don't lead with the Joe Bryant bit next time!
WHAT DID BARKLEY SAY
He said the Sixers shoulda kept Moses and traded Brad or traded Moses and kept Brad.
SEEMS REASONABLE
These are an unreasonable amount of words already, lets save that and more in Part II.
FACE ON THE FLOOR
I did not count the Charlotte Bobcats among the 17 other NBA teams active at the time which Chucky Brown did not play for, the Bobcats debuted two years after Brown's retirement. But if you told me Chucky Brown played for the Bobcats I'd one hundred percent buy that.
